Friday, October 24, 2003
serendipitous shutterbugging

office, skyline, blogger. have a happy friday.

love, krissa .... 10:23 PM ... link!

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real life, briefly

< sincerity >

i know posts here lately have been dribbling bits of fluff, having little or no bearing on my real life. so i'll do a rare comprehensive health/work/love update, for those of you who care. for those of you who don't care, please take this time to clean out your ear wax with a brand-name q-tipĀ®. they no doubt need it.

health being what it is, the thing you don't notice until it starts violently malfunctioning, my health is fine. after the great appendix debacle and its subsequent illnesses, i started to become mildly hypochondriac about going to the doctor, always expecting something else to spin wildly out of control, organ-wise. knock on wood, everything seems to be functioning at normal capacity. drinks to that!

work is really two things in my life - my job and my law school preparations. my job is proceeding apace. on a certain productivity level, i'm always one step ahead of the axe. there are honestly whole days where i do piddlingly small amounts of work, spending most of my day chatting to friends and reading blogs. but there are some great, frantic bursts of productivity, and not always right before a major deadline. i get excited about small projects, like organizing expense reports or chasing down invoices. my complete inability to open my mail on time (right,
penny?) remains intact. on the law school front ... wait, no, i don't want to talk about that, thanks. it continues to suck. that's all.

love is a tricky thing, how do you evaluate the love in your life? i have my friends as always - strong, funny, loving people who make my life a joy and are so entertaining and engaging that my bank account is always teetering on the edge of disaster just from the sheer amount of time i spend having fun with them. i love them dearly - all of them, through all their moods. and lucky for me, they love me through mine. and yes, you've been picking up the hints correctly .. i'm rather off the dating market again. sorry, lads - i've fallen for J's irresistible combination of intelligence, friendship, a cute ass and a killer smile. tough combination to beat.

so that's health. love. work. my days are filled with work, my evenings are either quiet nights at home or raucous nights with friends. after a rocky few months of love lost, awkward attempts at dating, organ-malfunction, the heat and intensity of summer has cooled into the breezy, cooler dusk of fall. drinks to that.

< / sincerity.>


love, krissa .... 5:00 PM ... link!

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Thursday, October 23, 2003
new digital camera loan + cute outfit = mirror picture!

now that the preppy look is in, let me just say, i knew it all along and i've been ready, people. very ready. i've got the button-downs, i've got the argyle sweater, i've got the peacoats and the plaid scarves and the loafers and the kick-pleat skirts and ...

just trust me. i've got it.

love, krissa .... 11:12 PM ... link!

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so glad to meet you, angeles

elliott smith is one of those rare musicians that's followed me through life. many other bands, i may only own one album, or like a handful of songs, or whose music only fits a certain phase of my life. i went through a blonde redhead phase, a ben folds five phase, a garbage phase. but from the moment my friend beth introduced me to smith's music, in mid 1998, it stuck with me.

x/o was actually the first album i bought, amusing because over time it became my least favorite. but i was enamoured with the song
independence day. x/o reminds me of my first elliott smith concert, at the now-defunct tramps, in the fall of 98. beth and i were freshman at slc, with scant friends, but we bonded over concerts like this, and we bonded over smith. i've never been the moony-fan type, but i spent long hours getting to know his music, finally understanding what the nirvana generation - my generation - had been trying to teach me through adolescence: that it's sometimes therapeutic to listen to depressing musicians. x/o reminds me of crisp fall evenings in my new home, getting to know new york city, and being lonely for the first time in my life.

either/or was on heavy rotation all through the summer of 2000, that i lived alone in new york city. i spent many nights in my room with the album on my treasured record player, drinking tea and staring out my big glass window on the lights of the village, wondering where i belonged and where i fit in. some nights weren't so morose - my then boyfriend and i would fall asleep somewhere in the middle of the second side, and my dreams were quiet and disturbing. but between the bars and rose parade always stayed with me as my favorite songs on the album. either/or reminds me of hot summer, of flip flops, of being alone, of being drunk, and of growing up.

but by far, figure eight remains my favorite album. this isn't based on some snooty dissection of smith's music - but on memory. i bought figure eight right as it came out, and i was heading to live for six weeks on fisher's island off the connecticut coast. at night, after putting the kids to bed, i would hop in my honda and take off down the desolate, winding island roads, all the way to the easternmost tip of the skinny island, and park the car on some gravel overlooking the ocean and a not-to-distant lighthouse rock. i'd turn on the stereo and lay on my car hood and write or read, listen to the beautiful pianos and thin, smoky voice and enjoy the sun going down behind me, setting over the island, turning the water from piercing dark blue to a slate grey. figure eight reminds me of winding roads and the grip of the tires to pavement, of trees flashing by and wind in the car, of seagull cries and the smell of beach bonfires and the flashing of the lighthouse at the easternmost point of fisher's island.

i'm sad elliott is gone - but not for myself. i'm sad for his family, for the people who actually knew and loved him. i'm not going to tell you i'll miss him, because what i have of him, what all his fans have of him, is only and was only ever his music. and the memories they play for you.

i could make you satisfied in everything you do
all your secret wishes could right now be coming true
i'll be forever with my poisoned arms
around you
no one's gonna fool around with us
no one's gonna fool around with us
so glad to meet you, angeles.

love, krissa .... 5:40 PM ... link!

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Monday, October 20, 2003
bullshit talks, ducks walk

last night i saw a commercial on TV, for dawn dishwashing liquid, where they were washing a cute little duck that had been badly coated in an oil spill. so the preternaturally friendly voice-over is all, "if this duck could talk, she'd tell you how glad she is to be clean again", you know, thanks to dawn detergent.

and i'm thinking, whoa. nuh-uh. if that little duckie would talk, she'd be all:

"BITCHES! you go SPILLING OIL *QUACK* into my HOME and then you PUT ME IN A BOX and cover me with SMELLY BLUE LIQUID and then you SCRUB MY HEAD *QUACK* WITH A TOOTHBRUSH, all so that some asshole in the midwest can power his THREE SUVs and *QUAAACK* TEN BEDROOM HOME with oil that you carry around on ships and then DUMP ON INNOCENT DUCKPEOPLE? if i could talk, you slimy motherfuckers, i'd take you to the CLEANERS, bitches, I'd wring you in court for everything you've GOT. and then i'd DRAG YOU BY YOUR HAIR into an OIL SLICK and i'd chain you *QUAAACK* and your mothers there for ETERNITY. DRINK DAWN AND DIE, BITCHES. QUACK."

that's what the duck would say.

love, krissa .... 6:53 PM ... link!

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